“You call it madness, but I call it love”–Don Byes

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“Sometimes, my mind battles with my heart. And often my heart loses the battle. Because what’s winning when we haven’t known a little love or loved back?”

I know you probably came here expecting my weekly fashion post and even assuming that I would have some date-night outfits or other such inane stuff. The truth is I just do not get Valentine’s Day-a day apparently to celebrate love, wear sexy underwear and prance around with fluttering eyes (really, only one day in 365 days???) Do not get me wrong, sometimes I do get sucked into this giant marketing ploy and in my head make elaborate plans for the day.

But when the St. Valentines arrives, knocking mightily on my door, instead of it warming the cockles of my heart the whole thing sends me into a WTF frenzy!! Admit it: Valentine’s Day is one HUMONGOUSLY overrated day in which we are expected to show our love by exchanging a string of undesired gifts (because we are material people living in a material world and all that )and fancy surprises (because love is nothing if does not come with a huge price tag). It’s not reality. It is  another commercialised facade and we are expected to conform. 

And conforming is something that does not come naturally to me.

Hence, this year instead of even pretending to celebrate it, I am going to throw caution to the wind and concentrate on the rest 364 amazing days of love, laughter and friendship because at the end of the day it is the little things that matter. And if you are in mood to celebrate then here are some ways that WILL warm the cockles of your heart no matter what.

Cooking: 

When the husband man without expecting or being told cooks a scrumptious meal. Cooking, is the new candlelight dinner for most parents, add a lit bit of wine and a lot of chatter and you will have a memorable recipe in hand, no matter what is cooking. Any man worth his charm would know that a way to a woman’s heart is definitely through her stomach.

Re-creating the first date: 

Valentines Day unique ideas

Anyone can go to fine dine dating place but why not add an extra zing to it by re-creating your first date atmosphere. This is especially true for those couples who have been together for a while and know everything about each other. This is guaranteed to warm anyone’s heart and give you more than one reason to smile and be thankful for.

Go Outdoor:

Valentines Day unique ideas

No one said Valentine’s Day has to celebrated in an expensive place with expensive shit around. Get out of your comfort zone and go adventurous and pick up an activity you love: be it hiking, a long walk, skydiving or bungee jumping. Outdoor activities take out the pressure of perfection and you would end up having more fun than anticipated and speaking from experience there is nothing more romantic than getting lost up in a mountain or in a woodland.

Get physical:

Valentines Day unique ideas 

And I do not mean the Fifty Shades kind but something more fun (and perhaps less painful) if you and your partner are gym rats or fitness lovers then why not bond on that? Pick a really interesting challenging, head to the gym, compete and see who wins.

Dress Up:

Valentines Day unique ideas

Now this is an activity you can do whether you are single or celebrating the day with your friends. Dressing up is an expression of self-love and self-love is the foundation of any kind of love.

I hope now you realise that it is not about soppy gifts and pricey experiences but little things that go a long way to fill you with love and happiness. I wish, all you people Happy Valentine’s Day.

Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed this post. Have a lovely week? Don’t forget to follow me. You can also follow me on Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter.

Dear hubby,

Love.

We all want it. We all seek it. When we find it; we do our best to relish it every day.

But then life gets in the way.

Ever since becoming parents, we have been consumed in a never-ending situation of busy. To-do lists, bills, work, baby, chaos has become part of our life. I am always lamenting that I never have time to do anything productive. You lament that you don’t have time to spend just with me. At night if we are lucky to get some time for ourselves we sit in silence too tired to talk. Perhaps lost in our own thoughts. And so life goes on.

you had me at hello

But despite the bedlam of life, this busyness, this not having time I just want to say I love you. I still remember our first date—in a ramshackle coffee shop. We were meeting for the first time, after months of talking on phone and online. I thought I would have a time tough as I was such an unsure, shy person that time. But our conversation kept going oblivious to the world. You hugged me and I thought I had found home.

We got married and promised we will grow old together.

So here’s the thing. I love you even though sometimes you exasperate me (and I know it’s a mutual feeling), even though sometimes I hate you. I love you through the hardships, the tears, the challenges that life will throw at us. I love you even though we won’t have time or energy to make grand gestures of romance. I love you through the grey hair and wrinkles. I love you through the smiles, the laughter, the songs, the joy and the love itself.

Because you are my home.

Yours,

Wifey

Hope you all had a great Valentines day.

Hope you enjoyed this post. Have a great week ahead.  Do show me your love with your likes and comments and don’t forget to follow me.    🙂

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Growing up as a young adult, two things scared me to death–marriage and commitment. No, it was not because I grew up in a household that was tearing apart or because I was  surrounded by hate. Quite the contrary. Marriage was something I never associated with myself; worse I never used to think I would ever be lucky enough to fall in love. Yes, along came a man who changed all that (more on him later). My college friends and peers taunted my “single” status for ages; some even giving me meaningful advice that I should stop intimidating the opposite sex with my radical views and should learn to act dumb and tender. How was I to make someone like me or fall for the “fake” me was never explained?  And there were those who thought I was a sexless robot; who was only interested in landing a job and cementing my reputation professionally.

How could I explain to them that my idea of love was just too high? That it wasn’t about expensive gifts and comforts, that it extended way beyond things that money can buy. I consider my own parents and grandparents to be the most romantic people, I’ve ever met. They belong to an era when there wasn’t any Valentine’s Day, when you didn’t have social media to declare your love, expensive gifts or trips around the world to make the other half feel desired. It was simpler times and love too was simple.

My thatha (Grandpa) was a tough cookie. He was a stoic man who rarely displayed any emotion. A man of uniform– perhaps his uniform brought in him toughness and discipline rarely seen in others. If I was afraid of anyone in the family it was only him. The only man who could straighten out this wayward, rebellious kid. I could never understand how my poor ammuma (granny) spent an entire life with him, raised four daughters and sailed through the ups and downs that life throws . To me, ammuma was everything thatha was not. She was gentle when he was tough; she was sweet when he was strict. She showered me with love when all he did was drill some discipline in me. She was chalk when he was cheese.

I could not imagine two people more different who were put together in marriage. It was an arranged one like the norm those days in India. For a long time, I felt they carried on the relationship because it was considered as a pious institution. But as I grew up, I learnt an interesting story from ammuma. I learnt about this tough man who gave up his only love; his uniform to be with her. To help her raise the kids (something which was solely woman’s job those days) and to leave his comfort zone, his moments of glory to be with her; love if nothing else is about putting the other person before you.

Yes, times got tough (like times do) and even money was slow but their steadfast love for each other kept the worst things at bay. For ammuma, thatha was a hero not because he constantly declared his love to her but because he gave her wings to fly, an independence which most of women (of later generations) take for granted. Love for them was a giant leap of faith in each other. Annoyingly enough, they could even speak each other’s thoughts.

You see why I thought love, marriage and commitment was too difficult  to fathom? My standards were just too high. It is not about expensive gifts or sexy candle night dinners.

It is about being a powerful team. It is when I don’t have to pretend anything with my man. It is when he treats me like an equal in every walk of life. It is about an unflinching faith.

And yes, it is about finishing sentences.